Somebody Loved

[softlyfalling]

softlyfalling,
Don't feel discouraged if people don't see what you see in your poetry. After all how could we know about your personal mythology? It's great you have that to spur you to write, but don't expect us to get it--and that's ok. What's important is that you write something that has meaning for you, but is open/clear enough for other people to insert their life experience. That's why images are so important, because everyone sees something slightly different in their heads, created from their imagination; the words in the poem give us a structure, a scaffolding if you will, with which to construct that picture. So in the end, if the images aren't clear enough in the words, we're no long all on the same page.
Not sure if that makes sense to anyone other than me, but that's how I view poetry, and its beauty. There will always be someone who doesn't like it and plenty of people who don't get it. But you're not writing for them, so it's ok.

Anyway about the poem, I basically agree with Mikey. The first two stanzas are very strong and then I just got confused. Maybe you could head in a different direction than you wanted for the second half, or keep the ideas but change the wording. Anyway it isn't at all a "bad" poem, just not perfect (and what is?? ;p )

It makes a lot of sense. More then that...it is enlightening and I can absorb it all and let it filter in to the chthonic reaches of my own mad mad world. I never thought of it that way, that images could illustrate my thoughts such that people OUTSIDE of my head could relate to the ones IN SIDE of my head!. Perhaps because for all of my life I have had trouble making myself understood and I may have given up...but HOPE renewed, i will edit the poem.