03-22-2013, 03:54 PM
Brilliant concept for a poem, Mikey.
For the sake of rhythm, would you consider "swear another oath" instead of "swear a new oath"?
Also, maybe dashes around -- sometimes -- as an aside rather than commas.
But such little things, because I really like this idea and the way you've delivered it.
For the sake of rhythm, would you consider "swear another oath" instead of "swear a new oath"?
Also, maybe dashes around -- sometimes -- as an aside rather than commas.
But such little things, because I really like this idea and the way you've delivered it.
It could be worse
