03-19-2013, 01:02 AM
It struck me as poignant and lovely that you refer to "the lord and his mum". This makes them accessible, close by, real, and somehow quaint in a wonderful, endearing way. A reader that objects to this is probably a very strict adherent to dogma, or, conversely, not close enough to his or her own spirituality to be comfortable with it....so, I think it works extremely well and i would NEVER think about changing it.
You have been given a ton of good advice about the enjambment (I am not adept at this yet either!)
Pope Francis seems like a lovely man, not to mention St Francis of Assisi is one of my favorites. My very favorite is St. Jude, and then St. Dymphna.
You have been given a ton of good advice about the enjambment (I am not adept at this yet either!)
Pope Francis seems like a lovely man, not to mention St Francis of Assisi is one of my favorites. My very favorite is St. Jude, and then St. Dymphna.