03-17-2013, 05:06 PM
Thank you, Leanne...I will take your comments to heart. I cannot always accommodate when there is meter and syllable count to contend with, as removing words intrinsically eaves a void which must be filled. Let me say that I very very much appreciate your feedback. I would love to give a bit of explanation, however...
"Looked down" was purposeful and meant to imply the ascended position and perspective of God as opposed to the mundane world.
"archipelago" is referencing islands in this case, not a body of water. "Shores" designates where the edges of the islands touch the sea, a demarcation as such...
I will think about "cleaved heavy heart" but in truth, I like it.
"Looked down" was purposeful and meant to imply the ascended position and perspective of God as opposed to the mundane world.
"archipelago" is referencing islands in this case, not a body of water. "Shores" designates where the edges of the islands touch the sea, a demarcation as such...
I will think about "cleaved heavy heart" but in truth, I like it.