Empty table

[angel in the stars]

Love the first edit. It flows so much better mentally and gives good images. I wonder about the modification of the third line of the last stanza, it has a few better words but just comes across as a little bit clunky. Maybe that's just me, it could just be the comma is causing me to chop it and maybe that's what you were after.
I also agree with goldyfish that the rhyme of lamp and plank doesn't really coincide with the rest of the rhymes in the poem. It just sounded more forced than the others, which were quite solid.