My poem: Poor Andre

[Jaylyn_D_Murray]

Oh I just wanted constructive criticism, and I agree with you, not much of my works sound or read like a poem.
But I'd also like to know how to write better rhythmic/lyrical/narrative poems, I'd like to know how to use more...'colorful' language(I guess)...it's like the language isn't there when I need it to be, I just don't always wanna use the more simple words I'm used to...
But if you wish, can you explain to me how's writing doesn't resemble a poem much and what I may do to change this please, thank you, and blessings!

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Oh I just wanted constructive criticism, and I agree with you, not much of my works sound or read like a poem.
But I'd also like to know how to write better rhythmic/lyrical/narrative poems(if you don't mind helping me), I'd like to know how to use more...'colorful' language(I guess)...it's like the language isn't there when I need it to be, I just don't always wanna use the more simple words I'm used to...
But if you wish, can you explain to me how the writing doesn't resemble a poem much and what I may do to change this please, thank you, and blessings!