Love's Prey

[Uncle Vertical]

Be weary of the lover’s love,
And place no trust in its resilience,
For it can only fail your certitude,
Leaving you alone on your deathbed,
Sacrifice your heart to love,
And you've sacrificed yourself,
For loves beheld does not always feel,
While the beholder becomes loves prey,
To be devoured whole,
To forfeit one’s soul,
And ultimately,
Die alone.

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I'm very new at this and really interested in any critique. Thank you.

I very much like the way this poem warns the reader rather than just tells the reader how the writer feels. I’m sure you meant the word “wary” rather than “weary” in the first line. I like what L7 and L8 are saying but I think “loves beheld” in L7 is kind of awkward. I can’t off-hand offer a better suggestion, but the way it is written confuses the reader as to the subject of the line. Is loves beheld talking about past loves or is it about the one being loved? I know it is the latter but I had to look at it for a while to be sure.