The Missus is on my Back.
#2
(12-22-2012, 09:11 PM)Pete Ak Wrote:  Wife on my back,
ankle-biters have pirated my feet.
Arms enfold my calves,
grins as wide as verity.
Along the path, gnarled hands
reach without grasping.
I trudge contentedly.
For reasons not apparent, even to me, I find I like the flow of this terse- verse. I quite like these short pieces because it is necessary to get in as much as possible in limited space....so the density goes up and I don't have to swim far between islands.
You may decide to tell us what it is about but I get kids, walk in woods, compulsory.
In fact, I love it. Grins as wide as verity from me.
I also like the punctuation. Done correctly, as it is here, words breathe in and out in their changing space. Well done. Can you write in rhyme?
Best,
tectak
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Messages In This Thread
The Missus is on my Back. - by Pete Ak - 12-22-2012, 09:11 PM
RE: Wife on my Back. - by tectak - 12-23-2012, 07:52 AM
RE: Wife on my Back. - by arbil_poieo - 12-23-2012, 08:17 AM
RE: Wife on my Back. - by Pete Ak - 12-28-2012, 05:25 PM
RE: The Missus is on my Back. - by billy - 12-28-2012, 05:43 PM
RE: The Missus is on my Back. - by Pete Ak - 12-28-2012, 05:54 PM
RE: The Missus is on my Back. - by billy - 12-28-2012, 06:01 PM
RE: The Missus is on my Back. - by Keith - 12-29-2012, 01:17 AM



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