10-06-2012, 08:08 AM
(10-06-2012, 05:00 AM)TimeOnMyHands Wrote: From the cracked walls, I am bornshould it be of the cracked walls? an odd comma could be added. i would have liked to see a little bit more about the guarded part.
Scratching, biting and beaten
Move my position to keep warm is it a request of do you mean 'I' move
Hunger rides my frame
Blind sibling fights for its survival no need for its
Losing grip I do the same
No cover comfort here
No swelling in my stomach
Should my ground be guarded
or is it time for flight.
a small edit could make this shine.
thanks for the read.
