08-30-2012, 08:28 AM
hi Bee, great start.
did you know that senryu like the haiku usually has a seasonal word in there somewhere?
on that premise can i suggest something along the lines of;
words melt like ice; for the first line. (or something along that line)
the cut works a treat and has an underlying softness about it.
did you know that senryu like the haiku usually has a seasonal word in there somewhere?
on that premise can i suggest something along the lines of;
words melt like ice; for the first line. (or something along that line)
the cut works a treat and has an underlying softness about it.