05-26-2026, 06:41 PM
spun with silver thread,
strung with pearls of morning dew -
the fly doesn't see
strung with pearls of morning dew -
the fly doesn't see
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Haiku
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05-26-2026, 06:41 PM
spun with silver thread,
strung with pearls of morning dew - the fly doesn't see
05-26-2026, 09:05 PM
05-26-2026, 09:50 PM
(05-26-2026, 06:41 PM)JohnS Wrote: spun with silver thread, As a bit of a spider-fancier, I give this full marks. Wondering about the em dash: I think it's correct, there's more than just pearls the fly's compound eyes miss. Non-practicing atheist
05-26-2026, 09:54 PM
05-26-2026, 10:01 PM
(05-26-2026, 09:05 PM)wasellajam Wrote:(05-26-2026, 06:41 PM)JohnS Wrote: spun with silver thread, Thanks Ella, I wanted to keep the English language format of 5,7,5. (05-26-2026, 09:50 PM)dukealien Wrote:(05-26-2026, 06:41 PM)JohnS Wrote: spun with silver thread, Thanks very much Duke. I think the em-dash is ok, according to my research. I had alternative last lines: "the fly never sees", "the fly bejewelled" or "dead fly bejewelled". (05-26-2026, 09:54 PM)busker Wrote:(05-26-2026, 06:41 PM)JohnS Wrote: spun with silver thread, Thank you Busker. |
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