Personal Poetic Purpose

[Quicksilver]

Plainly
Presentations in polite phrases
Pointing, per prolonged prognostication,
To public problems
Or, perhaps, plain, prosaic pride

Plaguing a populace
Via pithy profundity performance
Pills, per prideful prescription
Pressure-cooked pursuing pinnacles of personhood
But plaque-filled, and puddle-deep
Preachily screeching personal politics
Purpose-built, passive, performative shit

Per contra
Putting aside pleasant phrase-play
Words woven in crystalline lattices
Prismatic in both directions,
Internally transformative
Hopefully meaningful
Promoting phase-changes in attitude
Provoking a thought that would not be

That is my deep-well reason
Plain personal purpose
Of poetry

[Magpie]

Hi quicksilver, this is a bit confusing. 

The alliteration is distracting from writing a poem.

Some of the best phrases are the ones without a 'p' in the line

'Words woven in crystalline lattices'  

Alliteration is good, but not for most of the poem with the same sounds, it becomes problematic and distracts from the narrative. 

Thanks for posting

[Quicksilver]

Hey Magpie!
Thank you for the feedback. My intention there was to have the alliteration be a sharp contrast to the rest of the work? I set out to write a purely alliterative poem, and decided i didn't like how it sounded, so I went for a poem in two halves, and I was thinking that the first part would be me trying (and failing) to be clever, while the second part would be more genuine. So.... I guess it kind of worked? It may be too distracting even as an intentional device, I'm not sure.

[wasellajam]

Plainly
Presentations in polite phrases
Pointing, per prolonged prognostication,
To public problems
Or, perhaps, plain, prosaic pride

Plaguing a populace
Via pithy profundity performance
Pills, per prideful prescription
Pressure-cooked pursuing pinnacles of personhood
But plaque-filled, and puddle-deep
Preachily screeching personal politics
Purpose-built, passive, performative shit

Per contra
Putting aside pleasant phrase-play



Words woven in crystalline lattices
Prismatic in both directions,
Internally transformative
Hopefully meaningful
Promoting phase-changes in attitude
Provoking a thought that would not be

That is my deep-well reason
Plain personal purpose
Of poetry

Hi and ha, I thought that was pretty funny. It's amazing that you were able to actually make some sense that way. Thank you for the second half, the change from rant to beauty is acknowledged and appreciated. "Promoting phase-changes" bothered me, the return to the Ps and the complicated phase-changes which I'm sure could be expressed more clearly.
Thanks for posting it, a fun read.

[Quicksilver]

Thanks wasellajam, the feedback is much appreciated! I bolded a second pass at the trouble section below, definitely benefits from more clarity, and it let's me carry the prism metaphor more cohesively in that stanza. 

Plainly
Presentations in polite phrases
Pointing, per prolonged prognostication,
To public problems
Or, perhaps, plain, prosaic pride

Plaguing a populace
Via pithy profundity performance
Pills, per prideful prescription
Pressure-cooked pursuing pinnacles of personhood
But plaque-filled, and puddle-deep
Preachily screeching personal politics
Purpose-built, passive, performative shit

Per contra
Putting aside pleasant phrase-play
Words woven in crystalline lattices
Prismatic in both directions,
Internally transformative
Hopefully meaningful
Focusing down what is
To insistent heat that thaws frozen attitudes 
Provoking a thought that would not be

That is my deep-well reason
Plain personal purpose
Of poetry